Parenthood: The Sexless Frontier
by RogueAngel
Summary: Five times Jim Kirk thought he'd never have sex again and the one time Marissa screwed him silly.  These are a bunch of outtakes from my Consequences 'verse about the first few months of Abigail Kirk's life as Jim and Marissa adjust to parenthood.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's note: So this is a kind of follow up/outtake to _**Consequences**_. I have one more planned chapter for that story and then I'll start on the next, something along the lines of _**First Impressions and Quality Time**_ as little Abby meets and spends time with the people in Jim and Marissa's lives._

_For those of you who haven't read _**Consequences**_, you don't really need to, to read this. Just know that Jim accidentally knocked up a woman on his crew named Marissa shortly after the Narada incident and they now have a daughter named Abby. Of course, if you want to read it I wouldn't protest. ;-)_

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything relating to Star Trek, Chris Pine, Karl Urban, Zachary Quinto, et al. Marissa and Abby are of my own invention, but Marissa was inspired by TalesFromTheSpockSide's _**Hero**_ – check it out, it's awesome!_

_Also, this is very much rated Mature, despite the innocence of this chapter. It's about sex folks!_

**Five times Jim wondered if he'd ever have sex, and the one time Marissa screwed him silly.**

**One**

Jim was jealous of his daughter.

He was man enough to admit it - he was pea green with envy.

He loved her. He did. He loved everything about her five week old little soul.

He loved her bright blue eyes, so similar to his own; her fuzzy brown hair; her pert little nose that reminded him of Marissa. He loved her tiny hands and her tiny feet and her tiny, protruding frog-like belly. He even loved her increasingly smelly diapers and the sound of her plaintive cries when she was hungry or wet or just plain out of sorts.

He loved everything about her; could watch her for hours, even if she was just sleeping.

And he was jealous as hell.

He was jealous of the amount of attention Marissa lavished on their daughter and how little attention he was getting as a result. There were times when it was like Marissa was still pregnant. Abby was always with her and they never seemed to have any time together – alone.

Five days after giving birth Marissa had been requested to help another ship with a touchy contact situation via subspace. Adding that in with the follow up contacts from Cloral and a project she had been working on with Aja Killian and Marissa had very little down time. She insisted on keeping Abby with her, usually in a sling. If Jim was off duty he'd watch Abby, at least until she was hungry and then he'd have to call for Marissa anyway. Seeing Marissa's face light up when she came into their rooms always made him feel good, except now it wasn't for him it was for their child.

It was petty and childish, but he couldn't help it. He was jealous.

The rational side of him understood the demands of motherhood and the attraction of their wonderful, amazing, perfect child. Who wouldn't be at the beck and call of such an awesome little girl?

He and Marissa had agreed long before Abby was even born that they didn't want to put her in the _Enterprise's_ childcare facility right away. The daycare was top notch and Jim and Marissa had chatted with Daugherty and Simmons who ran it. They'd seen first hand how much the handful of _Enterprise_ children were loved and nurtured there. They just weren't ready to give up Abby for even a few hours. Between the two of them, with an hour or two break here and there with help from McCoy and once from Uhura, they'd taken care of Abby all on their own. Well, it was mostly Marissa, after all Jim didn't have mammary glands, but he helped out when and where he could.

He understood intellectually that Abby came first, that Marissa's job was important, and that he – and his needs - ranked a lowly third. They just hadn't found a balance yet, he consoled himself. Not with Abby needing to be fed every couple hours, twenty-four hours a day. They also hadn't expected Starfleet to request that Marissa consult on a contact mission so soon after giving birth, though Starfleet didn't know that little detail.

They'd debated telling Starfleet that she was on maternity leave, but hadn't really wanted to open that can of worms, so to speak. Maternity leave and inquiries regarding her subsequent partner and child would raise too many questions, questions they refused to lie about, but neither of them trusted the Admiralty at the moment to tell the truth, so they carried on as if nothing had changed. The last thing they needed was for Abby's birth to become fodder for the rumor mill that was finally dying down regarding Jim's life and past.

So, Marissa was busy being a full time, sleep deprived new mom and working full time consulting with the _Perseus_ regarding their contact with Novartium 12, as well as working on her other projects. Jim was busy being Captain and occasional host to various diplomats, as well as being a sleep deprived new dad. He did try to help Marissa out as much as possible, especially at night, but there really wasn't a hell of a lot he could do except change diapers and be a baby shuttle service to and from the crib.

So he was jealous that Abby got most of Marissa's attention. It wasn't that Marissa was ignoring him. She still reached for him whenever he entered their rooms, even if Abby was feeding or sleeping in her arms. She always hugged and kissed him if her hands were free. She would snuggle up against him with a contented sigh after he'd taken Abby back to her crib after a night time feeding. But all the hugs and the kisses and the cuddles, as much as he enjoyed them and looked forward to them, were too… chaste and he was finding himself more and more dissatisfied and frustrated.

He'd tried initiating steamier kisses, running his hands over her back and bottom in ways that he knew she liked – her breasts were definitely off limits for now – and Marissa had responded with a contented hum, if not her usual shimmy of interest, but when he pulled back he'd seen the tiredness in her eyes and he'd feel guilty. She had so much on her plate; she didn't need to deal with his needs, too; needs that he could take care of during his morning shower. It shouldn't matter that taking care of himself was nowhere near as satisfying. He was a grown man. He could tough it out. It was just that he not only missed the sex. He missed the sex with Marissa.

So, instead of dragging her off to bed to have his wicked way with her, he'd lead her to bed, tuck her in and pull her into his arms, relishing her closeness as she dropped into an exhausted sleep within minutes of lying down. After all, Abby was born just over five weeks ago; this constant state of exhaustion they were both feeling couldn't last, right?

So, yeah; Jim was jealous of his daughter. Her birth was the most amazing thing to happen to him in his entire life and he wouldn't change a thing, but… he didn't want to be overdramatic about it, but there were times when he wondered if he'd ever have sex again.

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	2. Chapter 2

**Two**

Jim watched as Abby's eyes blinked heavily.

"That's it baby girl," Jim hummed softly under his breath, swaying gently. "Let go. I know you're sleepy. Close your eyes, hmmmm. Go to sleep, baby girl."

Finally, she gave a huffy sigh and her eyes stayed shut, her body limp in his arms. Jim couldn't help but smile. She'd just had an epic late night snack and if all went well, she'd be asleep for at least five or six hours. At seven weeks she was miraculously sleeping most of the way through the night. She'd have her 'dinner' around six o'clock, go to sleep around nine o'clock, wake for a snack at eleven o'clock and then sleep until six in the morning or later. It was absolute heaven to get more than five hours of uninterrupted sleep.

What was making Jim particularly gleeful was that tomorrow neither he nor Marissa were on shift, which meant they didn't have to go to sleep as soon as Abby went down. Who cared if they stayed up later than usual? They could nap when Abby napped tomorrow and not feel the lack of sleep all day.

Besides, Marissa had been giving him 'the look,' and there was no way he was going to turn that down. They'd managed only one quickie since the _Perseus_ had stopped demanding so much of Marissa's time, but while that encounter had been physically satisfying, it'd been more of a quick and dirty solution; something to complete quickly before Abby woke up that morning.

The one morning they had actually had sex, he had been able to bring Marissa to orgasm while she was riding him, his fingers on her clit, but she'd been mortified when her milk had let down and literally hosed him down. He'd been so shocked by the warm spray that he'd come right then. It had definitely killed her libido, but Jim found himself intrigued.

He knew that there were people out there with lactating kinks, but he'd never thought much about it – to each their own, he'd thought. Until now. Now he kind of wanted to see if it could happen again. Was it an indicator of the strength of the orgasm or just an indication that it was almost time for Abby to eat? Either way, he hadn't had a chance to find out - yet. Marissa didn't say much afterwards, but he knew she was embarrassed. She had apologized despite his protests that there was nothing to apologize for and since then she'd avoided anything that might actually lead to sex, not that they had many opportunities with Abby around.

Tonight was going to be different.

Moving slowly, Jim lowered Abby into her crib, doing his best to keep her secure against his chest until the last moment. As usual, she began to stir once she hit the cool sheets, her small hands trying to rub against her face and wake herself up. Jim, an old pro at her little tricks now, blocked her hands and rubbed her back until she settled, then he slowly pulled away and practically tip-toed to the door.

Letting the door swish close behind him, he turned to see Marissa kneeling up on the bed, his t-shirt pulled tight across her chest, her legs bare, with a big smile on her face.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" she looked at him seductively.

"Yep," he grinned. "It's time to get some sleep."

Before she could manage a protest, he'd pounced on the bed and tackled her, causing a shriek to echo in their small bedroom.

"Shhh!" he admonished her, stretching over her, his hips settled perfectly between her legs. "Don't wake the baby!"

"You jerk," Marissa laughed, "as if sleep is what is on your mind right now." To prove her point she rocked her hips up against him.

"Hmmm," Jim hummed against her neck, grinding back down against her. "It's not the first thing that comes to mind, actually." He pulled the collar of her shirt down and licked and kissed his way to where neck met shoulder. "I'm sure I have some paperwork to work on somewhere. Something really important and you know – captainly."

Giving him better access to her neck, Marissa sighed, her hands making their way under his shirt. "Sure, Jim, sure. You go ahead and work on that. I'll just go to sleep then." Jim hissed and arched against her as her fingernails trailed down his back, just hard enough to get his attention.

"Oh, the cat has claws," Jim snickered.

"And she's not afraid to use them," Marissa responded, her voice an octave or two deeper than usual as she grabbed his ass and squeezed. "It's been awhile and I've missed you."

Jim leaned up on his elbows to look into her face. Smoothing some hair out of her face, he gave her a small kiss. "I've missed you too. This being parents thing is totally awesome, but I've missed having you all to myself."

Bringing her arms up and running her hands over his neck and through his hair, Marissa gently tugged on his head. "I'm all yours," she whispered against his lips before kissing him passionately.

Jim felt himself get light headed as all his blood suddenly went directly to his dick. This is what he wanted; Marissa warm and wanton and writhing under him. She didn't hold anything back as she kissed, her tongue sweeping through his mouth, rubbing against his in a thoroughly suggestive manner. Her hands felt like small brands as they moved over his back, across his rear, over his chest. He let out a startled moan when she pinched his nipples and then rubbed them soothingly.

God, he had missed this.

He deftly removed Marissa's shirt and underwear, tossing them to the floor, his shirt and shorts soon following. He couldn't seem to get enough of touching her; kissing her. Eventually he broke off their kiss, leaving them both panting, and continued to reacquaint himself with all the lovely skin on display in front of him. He kissed his way down her neck, over her collarbones and to her chest. Feeling her tense slightly, he did no more than cup her breasts, their weight unfamiliar in his hands, before pressing soft kisses around the nipples and moving down her body.

Her stomach was a bit squishier than before Abby was born, but still just as sensitive. He playfully tongued her belly button which was finally back in its rightful place, causing Marissa to giggle and tug on his hair. She didn't have any stretch marks; Chapel had seen to that a couple of weeks after giving birth. He could understand why she had wanted them removed, but he had also been a little disappointed. They were badges of honor; evidence that she had sheltered their daughter in her body. Still, if Marissa wanted them gone, he wasn't going to say anything.

By the time he reached the top of her mound, Marissa was panting and rubbing herself against him, trying to get as much friction as possible. He thought about teasing her, nipping at her inner thigh as he settled between her legs, but he'd missed this almost as much as she had. He could smell her arousal and he wanted to taste it, so with one quick swipe of his tongue, Jim dove in.

It didn't take long before Marissa was gyrating against his mouth and fingers; letting out soft little moans. Jim's tongue and jaw started getting sore far too soon. He was definitely out of practice. Still sooner than expected, she went still against him and he sucked her clit into his mouth as she came apart, her body tensing and clenching around his fingers. Jim couldn't help feeling that little bit proud of himself. He was the one who could turn her into a moaning, incoherent mess.

Easing her down from her orgasm, Jim rested his head on her thigh and watched as she came back to reality, her hands pressing tightly against her breasts. At Jim's questioning look, she shrugged at him.

"I didn't want to have another accident," she told him sheepishly.

"Really," Jim asked, slowly sliding up her body. "I wouldn't mind," he told her, his voice deep and seductive. "It was kind of… interesting."

"Embarrassing, more like," Marissa rolled her eyes.

"So, I've been wondering," Jim began, placing soft kissing on her knuckles that were covering her breasts. "Was it because it was, you know, really good? Or was it just because it was early in the morning?"

Blushing, Marissa shrugged. "A bit of both, I guess," she told him. "Like, just now, I could feel the tingling starting… the feeling that I get when my milk lets down, but I'm not full, so I could stop it."

"Tingling, huh?" Jim smiled, nuzzling her hands. "Think I could try again?"

"I don't know," Marissa grinned. "Think you can last that long," she laughed, letting go of her breasts and pulling Jim against her fully.

Smirking, Jim leaned down to kiss her. "Is that a challenge?"

"Maybe," Marissa bit playfully at his neck.

"Well, all right then."

Once again, all the blood that wasn't already in his dick headed south as he prepared to take Marissa up on her challenge. He'd get her tingling again - there was no doubt in his mind. Of course, it had been awhile and he couldn't remember feeling this hard and this turned on in a long, long time, but he was never one to back down from a challenge.

The stiffening of Marissa's body as she pulled away from his kiss barely registered, so intent was he on finally making love to her.

Being practically tossed off the bed was a bit of a shock; that was until he finally heard the increasing frantic crying coming from the next room.

"Abby!" Marissa said as she scrambled into her shirt, already halfway to the door.

Abby's cries put an instant damper on his arousal. He was only a few seconds behind Marissa as she picked up Abby from her crib and began to try and soothe her.

Jim had never heard their daughter cry like that. He was just getting to the point where he could usually distinguish between all her different cries: 'I'm hungry,' 'I need a new diaper,' 'I'm bored,' 'I'm awake,' 'I want to be entertained.' None of those cries sounded like this frantic, high pitched wail.

Marissa remained impressively calm, talking softly to Abby; rubbing her back and wiping away her tears.

"What's wrong?" Jim couldn't help asking. "Is she hurt? Is she in pain?"

"I don't know, Jim" Marissa told him, laying Abby down on the changing table. "Do you need to be changed, baby girl?" Marissa sing-songed as she checked Abby's diaper. That didn't seem to be the problem and Abby's crying continued. "Is something poking you?" Marissa proceeded to strip off Abby's pajamas. "Shhh, shhh, baby," she crooned. "You're working yourself up. What's wrong? Hmmm? Hmmmm?"

Picking Abby up, Marissa tried to cradle her in her arms, possibly to rock her back to sleep, but Abby was having none of that. She arched and protested, her cries becoming even louder. Marissa looked over at Jim as she switched positions, with Abby's head now on her shoulder. The look of worry and the beginnings of fear on her face causing Jim's adrenaline to spike.

"Should I call Bones?" he asked, already moving toward the other room.

"No, not yet," Marissa stopped him. "She's… something's wrong; something's upsetting her. But I don't think we need to wake up Len yet."

"He won't mind," Jim told her, not that he really cared if Bones' minded being woken up in the middle of the night. "It's barely past midnight. He might not even be asleep yet."

"No," Marissa told him, shaking her head. "She's calming down. Let's just wait, okay? If she's still fussy in an hour…" she shrugged. "Then we'll see."

Jim sighed. It was true, Abby had calmed a little. Her face was still flushed and she was doing these funny little hiccoughing whimpers, but she wasn't shrieking. "Okay, we'll wait a bit. What do you need me to do?"

"First," Marissa smiled, looking at him up and down, "why don't you put on some clothes?"

Looking down, Jim was surprised to see that he was still naked. "Yeah, good idea," he mumbled, going back into their room to grab his sleeping shorts and shirt. "Now, what can I do?" he asked once he was decently covered.

"Nothing at the moment," Marissa told him, pacing across the room towards him. "Why don't you get some sleep? I'll stay with her for now."

Placing his hand on Abby's back, Jim frowned to feel her shuddering breath. She was obviously still uncomfortable. "I can't sleep now," Jim told her honestly. "Why don't I take her and you rest for a bit. She can't be hungry yet. I can walk with her until then. Maybe she'll fall asleep. Besides," he added before Marissa could say anything "you were up with her last night and then up early this morning for that call with Thatalia."

"I can sleep tomorrow," Marissa countered, "I'm not that tired."

Jim smirked as her body betrayed her and she yawned hugely.

"I think I just saw your tonsils," Jim joked, reaching for Abby. "I've got her," he said, taking her gently from Marissa. "You go get some sleep. I'd be insulted if you weren't totally exhausted after my performance."

"It was pretty good," Marissa smiled sleepily.

"Pretty good?" Jim asked in mock dismay. "Only pretty good?"

Leaning on her tip toes, Marissa gave Jim a quick kiss. "It was amazing," she whispered.

Jim grinned. "Now that's what I like to hear!" He playfully swatted her on the behind. "Now go get some sleep. I want you well rested. Abby and I are going to have a little one on one time."

"Okay," Marissa said hesitantly, "if you're sure. Call me if you need me or if…"

"I'm new at this, Mariss," Jim smiled understandingly, "but I think I can handle her. I'll get you if she starts looking like she's hungry, but until then I can walk with her just as well as you can."

"I know," Marissa smiled. "I just…"

Stopping her with a kiss, Jim turned her around and shoved her gently out the door. "Go. Sleep. We'll be fine, I promise."

Jim walked the room for a few more minutes, singing softly to Abby and patting her back comfortingly. She showed no signs of going back to sleep; squirming and whimpering against his chest. At one point she let a rather impressive fart that had Jim grinning from ear to ear.

"Was that the problem, then?" he asked, joggling her softly. "Do you have gas? Well, better out than in, I say." After passing some more gas, she seemed to settle a bit more and Jim decided to try sitting in the rocking chair that Spock and Uhura had given them. Switching Abby so that she was laying in his arms, he sat down gingerly but that didn't last long. She immediately began to protest, her whimpers working themselves up into almost full blown cries again.

"Shh, shh," Jim whispered, standing up and resting her against his shoulder, swaying from side to side to try to calm her once more. "I'm sorry. Okay. Shh, shh, don't wake up mommy, okay? She needs her rest."

He paced for another half hour or so before he was sure she was asleep. Glancing at the crib he thought about trying to set her down, but decided not to risk it. She was still whimpering and shuddering even in her sleep, thought not as often as before. Gingerly, he sat down and then leaned back in the rocking chair again, Abby basically lying on his chest. She seemed fine with this and Jim let himself relax a little. After all, it was now approaching three in the morning and he had had a long day, too.

It was just past five o'clock when she began to stir again, her mouth making smacking noises against his neck. Jim's eyes were dry and irritated. He had done his best to stay awake, working over duty rosters and training schedules in his mind, but he was almost done for. He needed some sleep.

Abby began stirring against him, rubbing her face into his chest and rooting against him, her legs drawn up under her belly. Standing carefully, he brought her over to the changing table and laid her down and quickly changed her diaper. By now her eyes were open.

"Good morning, Miss Abby," Jim whispered. "Are you done being fussy?" He quickly pulled on her sleeper that Marissa had discarded earlier. It wasn't too cold in the room, but now that she wasn't pressed against him she was starting to cool slightly. "Are you hungry? Should we go wake up mommy?" She made a small gurgling sound and Jim scooped her up. "Let's go see if mommy has managed to steal my pillow, shall we?"

Sure enough, when Jim entered their bedroom he saw Marissa sprawled out in the middle of their bed. She had managed to snag his pillow and cuddle it against her chest, one leg thrown over it.

"Mommy's a pillow thief," Jim told Abby, who began to scrunch up her face into the beginnings of a cry.

Moving to the bed, Jim reached down and rubbed a hand down Marissa's back, before moving away quickly. He'd learned over time that it was best to keep oneself at a distance when waking up Marissa because she tended to sit up like a jack-in-the-box if she was really tired – which was like, all the time lately.

"Wha… What?" she blinked owlishly at him.

"Someone is getting hungry," Jim told her, trying to control his smile. She was so cute when she just woke up. "She's changed and ready when you are."

"How'd it go? Did she sleep?" Marissa asked, getting out of bed and taking Abby.

Jim shrugged. "A couple hours, maybe. She did pass some rather impressive gas," Jim grinned. "I didn't think a body that tiny could make that much noise – at least from that end."

"Hmm," Marissa nuzzled Abby's neck, "maybe that was the problem." Glancing up, she looked at Jim in concern. "You look exhausted. Get some sleep. I've got Abby now."

"Okay," Jim didn't even bother to protest. Leaning down he kissed Marissa and then placed a kiss on Abby's head. "Night, night."

A half hour later, Marissa was curling up beside him in bed. An hour after that they were both leaping out of bed in response to Abby's frantic cries.

Seeing her red, scrunched up face and obvious discomfort as Marissa patted her back and joggled her up and down, Jim made a command decision.

"I'm calling Bones."

"Jim," Marissa called after him, following him into the living area. "It's probably gas, just like you said earlier. She'll…"

"What's the point in having a CMO as a best friend if I can't call him for something like this?" Jim countered. "So what if it's just gas. He might have something for it or know what's causing it. I don't like seeing her like this."

"Neither do I," Marissa admitted, "but it's early and…"

"It's almost seven o'clock, he'll be awake, or he should be."

Jim turned to the comm. and put in McCoy's contact. The room was silent except for Abby's pitiful cries.

"What?" came the surly voice of the CMO over the comm., "this had better be good."

"Bones," Jim responded, "Abby's been up most of the night crying and…"

"All night?" McCoy interrupted, sounding totally alert and in doctor mode.

"Not all night," Jim admitted, feeling slightly sheepish now that he was talking to his friend. "She woke up around midnight crying like we've never heard her and she wouldn't calm down unless I was walking her. She dozed in and out and… and then after Marissa fed her this morning, about an hour later she started again and you can hear her, right? She normally doesn't cry like that and we think it might be just gas, but…"

"Jim," McCoy interrupted, "shut up and meet me in Medical in ten minutes, okay? I've got to get dressed at least."

"Yeah, okay," Jim replied, his relief obvious. "Thanks Bones. You're the best."

"Ten minutes," McCoy repeated and Jim could almost hear the eye roll.

It was really nice having a best friend as your CMO.

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	3. Chapter 3

Three

Jim peeked into the bathroom watching Marissa study herself critically in the mirror, turning to inspect her rear and then looking down at her breasts and stomach. It was ten days since Abby's epic night of crying and they still hadn't managed some alone time.

He liked to think it was because they were both so tired. He had been on two away missions to Farngul, the planet they were currently orbiting, while trying to help with trade negotiations between them and their neighboring planet. Marissa had been in almost constant contact with Aja Killian regarding their project that seemed to be picking up steam rather quickly. Add in Abby and her demands and it wasn't surprising that sex wasn't on the top of their list of things to do.

Still, watching her stare in the mirror, Jim wasn't so sure that their work schedules had much to do with their lack of activity in the bedroom. Since Bones had declared that Abby's crying fit had been due to excessive lactic acid in Marissa's breast milk due to her working out in the gym, Marissa had become withdrawn.

Not at first, though. At first she had felt guilty that her actions had discomfited Abby. Jim had chalked it up to a live-and-learn experience, but then he'd been planet-side for three days. When he returned everything had seemed normal, but Marissa… she wasn't the same. He hadn't noticed at first, but she began to shy away from his touches and she didn't touch him at all. Even in bed she'd start the night as far away from him as possible, sometimes with a pillow wedged between them, though by morning they'd be snuggled together – if she didn't sneak out first.

It just wasn't like her. They'd always been extremely tactile; even before they'd starting sleeping together – a hug, a kiss, a caress, a playful slap on the ass or shoulder. Jim didn't realize how often he touched Marissa and she touched him until it wasn't happening any more.

"Moo," Marissa's forlorn voice brought his thoughts back to the present as she sighed deeply at her reflection.

Deciding it was time to talk about what was bothering her, Jim stepped fully into the bathroom and leaned against the doorway, arms crossed casually.

"Whatcha doing?" he opened.

Startled, Marissa glared half-heartedly at him before turning back to the sink and grabbing her toothbrush. "What's it look like I'm doing?" she asked rhetorically, "I'm getting ready for bed. Is Abby ready to be fed?"

Glancing over his shoulder, Jim check out their daughter lying on their bed staring and cooing at the toys suspended over her head. "Not yet," he replied. "She's playing with the mobile Scotty made for her."

Marissa nodded as she put the toothpaste on her brush and began brushing.

"I know you were getting ready for bed," Jim said conversationally. "I wanted to know why you were staring at yourself in the mirror."

Marissa's only response was to shrug and roll her eyes at him, not stopping her brushing.

"What's wrong, Marissa," Jim asked. "And don't look at me like I'm crazy. Something's wrong. You don't let me touch you. I've barely gotten a kiss good night since Abby's crying fit last week. You don't touch me, you don't hug me. What's wrong?"

Closing her eyes, Marissa shrugged, not bothering to look at him. "Nuffig's wong," she said through the foam in her mouth.

Jim studied her a bit longer. "Bullshit," he finally told her. "I don't believe that."

Spitting and rinsing, Marissa put away her toothbrush and grabbed her headband, preparing to wash her face. "Nothing's wrong, Jim. I'm just tired."

He cocked his head for a moment, watching her begin to scrub her face and neck. "We were tired after Abby was born," he pointed out. "We were tired five weeks ago. We were tired ten days ago, but you still managed to smile at me. You still hugged me and kissed me. What's wrong, Marissa. I've been trying to figure out what I've done, but…"

"You haven't done anything," Marissa snapped, before bending down to rinse her face. Blindly she reached for a towel, hiding from him as she patted herself dry. "Not everything is about you, Jim," she pointed out tiredly.

"Fair enough," Jim responded calmly. "So what is wrong? Ten days ago we were all over each other, despite being tired and now if I even try to kiss or touch you, you retreat. I miss you," he said softly, "I miss holding you and touching you and… having sex with you."

"I'm so sorry you're not getting enough stimulation from me," Marissa finally snapped, throwing her towel into the hamper and turning to face him. "If you want more sex maybe you should find someone else."

Jim flinched like she had slapped him. "Someone else?" he repeated, not able to keep the shock from his voice. "I don't want someone else. I want you."

"You want me?" Marissa laughed darkly. "How the hell could you still want me? I'm fat and flabby and leaky and my ass is the size of a small planet. I know I'm not attractive. I can barely keep my hair from frizzing and my skin is going nuts and…."

"Whoa, stop, stop," Jim interrupted her tirade, stepping from the doorway and grabbing her shoulders.

"Jim, don't," she shrugged his hands off, taking a step away from him and wrapping her arms around herself; her shoulders hunched defensively.

"Marissa," Jim began slowly, "I don't understand where this is coming from. Things seemed fine…"

"I don't want to talk about it," Marissa told him, her voice thick with tears.

Glancing towards their bed, Jim made sure Abby was still occupied and hadn't, by some miracle, rolled away. He then moved so that he stood in front of Marissa. Using one finger, he lifted her chin so that he could see her face. "Marissa," he said softly, trying to infuse his words with all his caring and concern. "What's wrong? You know that I don't want anyone else."

"Do I?" she countered bitterly.

"You should," Jim reprimanded gently. "And this isn't about the sex. Yes, I want it. Yes, I miss it, but I'm as tired as you are. Okay, almost as tired," he corrected when she snorted derisively. "But I wasn't talking about sex earlier. I was talking about… about you and me. I miss touching you and kissing you even if we aren't going to have sex," he told her honestly. "I miss your smile when you see me and I miss holding you at night. That's what I miss. And I want to know what happened, because everything seemed fine and now its not."

Jim watched as Marissa's face slowly crumpled and the tears she had been holding back began to fall rapidly. "I miss it too," she admitted.

Relieved beyond words, Jim pulled her into his arms and held her tightly. "I'm glad," he whispered, placing a kiss against her temple. After a few minutes her tears slowed and Jim pulled away slightly. "Do you want to tell me what's bothering you now?" he asked, gently wiping away some stray tears.

Marissa sighed and buried her face against his chest again. "I'm a cow," she finally whispered. "I'm a fat, ugly cow."

"You are not fat and ugly. And you are most definitely not a cow," Jim admonished, rubbing her back soothingly.

"Well, I feel like it," Marissa countered stubbornly. "It seems like my life revolves around my boobs. I'm either full and achy, or Abby's slurping down another meal. I smell like milk all the time – eau du cow, and I constantly have to change shirts because I've leaked all over them," she whined. "They're sore and tender even when I'm walking and I can't work out in the gym because it makes them feel even worse, but I have to work out because I'm a fat cow, but I can't really because it just upsets Abby and I don't want to do that, but I'm not fitting into my clothes and my pants are too damn tight and my ass is huge and my boobs are huge and my stomach is saggy and…"

Jim couldn't stop himself from chuckling. He knew it was the wrong response, but he just couldn't help it. Marissa never whined like this, that was his job.

"This is not funny, Jim," Marissa scolded looking up at him angrily.

"I know it's not," Jim replied, trying to school his features. "I know and I'm sorry, but… if you could just hear yourself."

Pulling at of his arms, Marissa glared at him. "If I could just hear myself? I don't need to hear myself," she snapped. "I can see myself just fine, thank you very much." She spread out her arms, as if forcing him to really look at her. "I'm fat. I have leaky boobs and a big ass."

"You're not fat," Jim told her placatingly. "Granted, right now you're a bit leaky," he smiled as she looked down and swore at the wet patches on her chest, "but you don't have a big ass. Actually, I'm rather partial to your ass, so I really don't like hearing you say bad things about it."

Marissa rolled her eyes. "I know what kind of women you've been with in the past and I'm willing to bet not one of them had an ass this big. And none of them was as fat and… and… short as I am."

Jim couldn't help his smile from hardening just a little. He didn't like talking about the women in his past, even with – especially with – Marissa. "They don't matter," he told her succinctly. "And tastes change. You are who I am attracted too, now."

"But for how long?" Marissa sighed, seeming defeated, leaning against the vanity. "I know about the senator on Farngul, Jim."

"What about her?" Jim countered defensively, crossing his arms.

"I know she propositioned you," Marissa stated. "I know she was all over you. She wanted you in her bed."

"She can want me in bed forever," Jim stated firmly. "I didn't want her."

"Really," Marissa asked, daring him to disagree. "I've seen holos of her; I've heard security go on about her perfect figure and tiny waist and legs up to her armpits. Can you honestly tell me you weren't attracted to her?"

"Yes," Jim nodded instantly. "She was aesthetically pleasing to look at. Really hot, if you want to be crass about it, but she wasn't you, Marissa. I had no urge to sleep with her no matter how many suggestions she whispered in my ear and no matter how often she decided to rub up against me like a cat in heat. She. Wasn't. You."

Marissa looked shocked by his emphatic statement, making Jim feel pleased with himself. He honestly hadn't been attracted to the senator. She was too tightly packaged and perfect. While he had no doubt that she'd be a good romp in bed, he hadn't even considered her offers. Not when he had Marissa back on the _Enterprise_. Sex with the senator would offer him release, but nothing else. The idea of trying to cuddle with the stick thin senator was laughable.

Reaching out, Jim caressed Marissa's cheek. "I want you," he told her, "whether it's sex or cuddles or a smile in passing. I want you. Why is that so hard to understand?"

"There's a pool," she finally whispered, her eyes filling with tears again.

"A pool? What pool? Like when Abby was born?" he asked, confused.

Marissa shook her head. "It's one… people are betting on when… on when you'll get tired of me and find someone else," she told him in a small voice, not able to even look at him.

His hand fell away from Marissa and Jim froze; his stomach tightening like it did before a fight. "Scotty?" he asked incredulously.

"No," Marissa shook her head. "Not Scotty. Someone else."

"Who," Jim asked in a deadly calm voice.

"I'm not going to tell you that, Jim," Marissa countered sadly. "You can't allow Scotty's betting pools and then crack down on this one."

Jim stared down at her for a minute his temper soaring and then turned away. "Damn it!" he roared as he punched the wall next to the door. Why couldn't people leave him – them – alone? Was it really too much to ask? He was happy. They were happy. Wasn't that good enough?

His outburst startled Abby in the bedroom and she started to cry. Marissa rushed past him and picked her up, cooing and kissing and avoiding looking at Jim.

Jim felt his heart ache. That's what he wanted too; he wanted Marissa's attention. He watched as Marissa settled at the head of the bed and prepared to give Abby her night time snack. He was upset, truly pissed off, that people on his crew would cruelly speculate on the end of his relationship with Marissa so shortly after their daughter was born, but Marissa was right, there was nothing he could do – officially.

Scotty had run a couple of harmless pools on the date of Abby's birth, whether it would be a boy or a girl, and what the name might be. Uhura had cleaned up pretty well on the last one. Jim hadn't known about them, but he hadn't objected when he heard. Betting pools were standard at the Academy and was it any surprise that they followed onto the _Enterprise_? Still, this pool was just cruel. He'd have to talk to Spock; see if his first could ferret out who was running this particular pool and put a stop to it. He didn't even want to know who it was because if he did he'd want to punish them in some way and he couldn't.

Right now he had to do damage control with Marissa. Bones had warned him that after giving birth women's emotions could be just as screwy, if not more so, than during pregnancy. He still hadn't been prepared for this.

Marissa ignored him as he climbed onto the bed beside her. Trying not to jostle Abby too much he repositioned them so that Marissa was between his legs, leaning back against his chest. Wrapping his arms around her, helping her hold Abby while she ate, Jim kissed the side of Marissa's head.

"I'll say this as many times as you need me too," he whispered. "I don't care what everyone else says. I don't care who I slept with in the past. I want you. You are perfect. You're not skinny, but you're not fat, either," he emphasized, squeezing her lightly. "No one expects you to be back to where you were before Abby was born. It's barely been a two months, for crying out loud. You fit perfectly in my arms," he told her. "I like how your head rests against my heart when you hug me, like you just want to hear it beating and know I'm close.

"I like the fact that you're soft and rounded and not stick thin and boney. Until you I've never cuddled with a woman and I really, really like it. I can't imagine it if you were any skinnier. You're padded in all the right places and I can easily spend hours just exploring the wonderful nooks and crannies of your body. You are not fat," he repeated again, "and I don't want to hear you say anything bad about your ass. I love your ass. I get half hard just watching you walk about from me, no matter where we are at the time. I just want to grab it and squeeze and never let go, so don't say anything bad about it to me, you got it?" He squeezed her and she nodded, letting out a suspicious sniff.

"I don't care what other people say about us," he told her, resting his chin on her shoulder and looking down at Abby. He gently cupped the baby's head in his large hand. "They don't matter. Only we do – you and me and Abby. I've never been so happy and content in my life," he said honestly. "I've never looked forward to coming home. I've never really had a home. You've given that to me. And it's not just Abby. It's you. I know I don't deserve you, but I'm going to keep you for as long as I can. I don't care if we're not having sex. I miss it; holding you and making love to you, but that's not all you are to me. If I could just hold you like this, it's enough. Do you understand?"

Marissa nodded, sniffing loudly.

"Good." He pressed a kiss to her cheek and felt her tears against his lips. Slowly he kissed them away, before reaching her lips and placing a chaste kiss on them. "You're mine and I'm not going to let you go."

Abby let out soft burp and they both smiled, breaking eye contact to look down at her. She was obviously done with her snack and was already drifting off. Neither of them moved to take her back to her crib. Instead, Jim shifted Marissa so that she was cradled in his arms just as Abby was cradled in hers. With a sigh, Marissa settled her head against Jim's shoulder and relaxed.

"Mine," Jim whispered, hugging them both.

"Yours," Marissa replied just as softly.

It didn't matter that his legs fell asleep within minutes, Jim wasn't going to let go of his family, but after an hour of snuggling he didn't protest when Marissa got up and put Abby in her crib. Instead he crawled under the covers and waited. When Marissa returned, smothering a yawn, he opened his arms to her. Sliding into bed, she rested her head on his chest, throwing a leg and an arm over his body.

"Thank you," she whispered in the darkness, placing a kiss over his heart.

"You're welcome," he answered, kissing her head in return. "Let me know if you ever need me to say it again."

Marissa smiled against him. "Always."

"No problem."

In the peace and quiet of the night, Marissa finally drifted to sleep against Jim, back where she belonged. Jim stayed awake for a little longer, enjoying the feel of her in his arms. This was what he wanted. This was enough.

Didn't mean he didn't miss the sex, though, it just meant that he was growing up and realizing that it wasn't all about the release. Sometimes the closeness was enough.

Wouldn't Bones be proud that he'd finally figured it out?

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	4. Chapter 4

Four

The anniversary of the destruction of Vulcan was a milestone in Jim's captaincy that he did not look forward to reaching. It signified both the highest point of his career – the saving of Earth and the destruction of the Narada – and the lowest – his purposeful insubordination against Spock and taking over the _Enterprise_ from its rightful captain. Sure, he'd been proven right in the end; Earth would not have survived if he hadn't acted like he had – like an asshole - but that didn't mean he had to like it.

There would be memorials across the universe for those lost during that horrible battle, though could it really be called a battle when six of the seven ships hadn't had time to even defend themselves, Jim often wondered. He'd been informed by Starfleet that the services conducted on the _Enterprise_ would be beamed to all Starfleet ships, bases, and other facilities, including the Academy.

No pressure.

Everyone had lost someone – friends, family, colleagues. He just happened to be considered the 'Hero of Earth,' a title that did not sit well with him, but the Admiralty thought hearing him speak would be good for the people of the Federation.

He'd been stressed ever since the Admiralty had informed him of their plans a week before the anniversary, wanting to do his best but having no way to encapsulate the loss of so many beings in so short an amount of time. It wasn't just the Terrans who lost friends and family; the remaining Vulcans had lost everything – friends, family, colleagues, and their home.

Jim was aware of the funk that Spock had fallen into as the memorial approached. His first officer was as stoic as ever, but if you knew how to look you could tell by the set of his shoulders and the perfect, absolute calmness of his expression that he was hurting. Or you could just watch Uhura watching Spock and know that something was wrong.

He wanted to do this right. He wanted to honor the fallen and the lost for their own sakes and for Spock, his friend who lost so much.

So he didn't sleep much. He tossed and turned most nights and rather than waking Marissa with his restlessness, he sat on the couch and thought and remembered and tried to come up with something that he could say that wasn't clichéd or prosaic or just utterly useless.

In the end there wasn't a dry eye in the hanger, the only area large enough to host the memorial service, when Jim was done with his speech. He said the usual things about remembering the dead and hoping that such events would never happen again. But it hadn't felt right, true though it was. It was what Starfleet and everyone else expected him to say. But it wasn't right.

Glancing over at his command crew, meeting Spock's blank eyes, Jim sighed and looked down at the speech he had agonizingly written. He knew that what he was saying was being beamed all over the universe and would forever be a footnote in the history of the Battle of Vulcan, but he didn't care.

Looking up, he stared out into the crowd and found Marissa, her face already wet with tears. She smiled reassuringly at him and nodded. He crumpled the speech he had written.

"I'm sorry," he finally told them. "I'm sorry we couldn't do more; couldn't stop Nero. I'm sorry that we weren't fast enough or quick enough or clever enough to stop him; to prevent this tragedy from happening. I think as a… as a people… as a united Federation we are struggling under an incredible burden of guilt: could we have stopped him? Could we have prevented this? Why did we live and others die? Why did Earth survive, yet Vulcan did not? We are all suffering from survivor's guilt. A whole universe crippled by sadness and guilt.

"As many of you know," he said ironically, a small, wry smile flirting over his lips, "my father died saving the crew of the Kelvin as well as my mother and myself. He sacrificed his life so that so many others could live. For years I lived with the guilt that he had died for me. I lived in the guilt, I embraced it and I let it rule my life. Then I joined Starfleet and I realized the calling that it was – to serve and protect; to defend and help when no one else can. Our brothers and sisters of Starfleet died doing their duty and following the example of those who have gone before, like my father. We should mourn them, but we must honor them too; for doing their duty until the very end. I can only hope that my end will be as honorable."

He paused and took a deep breath, once again glancing back at Spock. "I cannot speak to the loss of Vulcan. After merely a Terran year its loss is still incomprehensible to me. The loss will be felt for thousands of years." He shook his head, "loss, such a small word to encompass the practical extinction of a proud, noble race. I have been honored to serve with the very best Vulcan officer Starfleet has produced and in my duties I have met many others. If I can say one thing that I've learned about Vulcans it is that they are strong, even before they are logical. They have already looked ahead and are beginning to build their future. Vulcan, the planet, has been destroyed; Vulcan, the people, never will be."

Looking around the hanger, he inhaled deeply. This was the end; he hoped that he had done justice to those who were gone.

"Many lives were sacrificed and lost a year ago," Jim said solemnly. "I don't think we'll ever be able to truly comprehend such a huge loss from our lives and the universe. But each being lost was an individual and instead of mourning them as an incomprehensible whole - how can you mourn billions of people? - They should be remembered individually with laughter and tears and love by those who knew them best – their friends and family. They will not be able to live their lives as they should have, so we must live for them."

"I cannot speak for the rest of you listening to me, but for those of you here on the _Enterprise_, I ask you not to make this a day of mourning, or not only mourning. I'd like you to make this a day of celebration. Spend time together remembering your friends, colleagues and loved ones. Laugh, cry, but above all else remember. Ask yourself what you would want – tears and inconsolable grief, or laughter and fond memories."

He stood awkwardly for a moment, unsure what else to say. He had the strange urge to say 'Kirk out,' but didn't. Then there was the sound of a lone pair of hands clapping and soon it was a swell of applause. Nodding uncomfortably, he looked around at his crew and felt a rush of pride. They understood.

"What are you waiting for?" he asked them. "Dismissed."

xXx

That night, in the quiet of their rooms, Jim held Marissa while she told him about Gary. He was right, in the days after the destruction of Vulcan and returning to Earth she had cried, but so much had happened that Gary's death had been lumped into the gaping loss of so many. She had never mourned him individually.

It felt good to tell someone about his habit of keeping everything on a desk or table perfectly straight, or being unable to use a towel that had already been used once. At the end of their relationship all of it had driven her nuts, but in the beginning they had been endearing quirks. It was so much easier to remember the good times when she was wrapped around Jim.

Gary would have liked Jim, she was sure of it.

In return, Jim had told her about Gaila. How she had been one of his special 'friends' during his third year and how he regretted never getting to apologize for using her to beat the Kobyashi Maru. He really thought she would have understood once she got over her initial anger, but now he would never know for sure.

They fell into an exhausted sleep, snuggled closely together, and only Abby's hungry cries woke them early in the morning.

The day after the ceremony everyone was withdrawn, but there wasn't a desperate feel to it. Life was moving on. Even Spock seemed to feel it. He came to their quarters briefly to thank Jim for his words.

"It's what my mother would have wanted," he told them solemnly. "She was a very… happy person. She loved life and she would not want me – or anyone – to waste their life in grief." He looked over at Abby who was lying on the couch, her big blue eyes seemingly taking in everything in the room. He went over and kneeled by her, one finger tracing her fine eyebrows and the sweep of her jaw. Using her new found coordination Abby managed to grab his finger and pull it to her mouth.

"Life comes, even while death surrounds us," he said softly. "And that is as it should be. Live long and prosper, little one."

Standing, he turned and nodded at Jim and Marissa before silently leaving.

"He's a very smart man," Jim said quietly, putting an arm around Marissa's shoulders as they looked down at Abby.

"Yes, he is," Marissa agreed, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head against his chest. "We're lucky to have him on this ship."

"We're lucky to have him as a friend," Jim countered. "He's right too," Jim continued. "Even in death there's life. Like my dad and me and the survivors of the Kelvin. Like the growing colony on New Vulcan. Like you and me and Abby. There's always life and where there's life there's hope. And where there's hope, there's a future."

Marissa looked up at him and smiled wryly. "That's very poetic there, Kirk."

Jim blushed and shrugged. "I blame Spock."

"Well, what do you say we take our future and make a visit to 10 Forward?" Marissa suggested. "We can share a little bit of our hope with the crew."

Smiling, Jim kissed her head and then moved to pick up Abby. "That sounds like an excellent idea. Besides, I've heard that a baby is an excellent chick magnet."

Laughing, Marissa swatted him lightly on the behind. "Don't get any ideas, Jim."

"Never," he replied, leaning down to press a quick kiss to her lips. "I'm taken - though maybe we should consider renting her out on occasion. I bet some guys will pay good credits to have such a cute baby to pull in the girls."

"I don't know where you get your ideas," Marissa replied as she followed him out the door. "Don't let Uhura hear you calling the women on this ship 'chicks.' She'll skin you alive and I'd let her."

Jim scoffed. "Are you kidding? Uhura won't even notice a word I'm saying if Abby's in the room. This kiddo is my get out of the Uhura doghouse card."

"As if you could be so lucky," Marissa rolled her eyes.

It felt good to laugh and joke again. The past week had been stressful on everyone. It was hard work to mourn a life – or so many lives. It was much easier to celebrate them.

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	5. Chapter 5

**Five**

"You know, we've never really been on a date," Jim said while Marissa was feeding Abby. They were ready for bed and Marissa could barely keep her eyes open as her head nodded as she waited for Abby to finish.

"Huh?" she looked over at him blearily. "What?"

"We've never been on a date," Jim repeated, putting his PADD on his nightstand and flopping over onto his side, elbow bent, propping up his head so that he could see her and play with Abby's feet.

"Sure we have," she responded with a smothered yawn. "I mean, we went out all the time while we were on Base 17 – dinners, lunches, a play… to the aquarium. Those were dates, weren't they?"

Jim shrugged. "They don't count; we were with Bones and Janine the whole time. It's never been just us."

"We've eaten in the mess and alone here in our quarters."

Jim made a moue of distaste. "That really doesn't count. Replicated food is not date food."

"Well, I guess we kind of skipped the whole dating thing," Marissa said after some thought.

"And that doesn't bother you?" Jim asked.

Marissa shrugged. "Should it?"

Flopping onto his back, Jim stared up at the ceiling. "I don't know. I've never really tried dating anyone and here we are living together with a kid."

Abby seemed finished with her snack so Marissa got up and moved towards the nursery. With any luck she'd sleep until morning. "I've done the dating thing," Marissa told Jim as she patted Abby's back trying to get her to burp so she could put her down to sleep. "It's nice, but I like what we have too."

"I do too, I just…" he trailed off and shrugged, looking at her sheepishly. "I liked taking you places and seeing you across a table in a candlelit room. I liked flirting with you and making you laugh and the anticipation of wondering if I'd score."

Chuckling, Marissa shook her head. "If this is your idea of a come on, Jim, it's not working. I've been up since before 0600 this morning and I'm exhausted. The only thing I'm thinking about is sleep, preferably at least four or five hours straight."

Jim rolled his eyes. "I'm not talking about now," he said, "I'm talking about later… we plan a time when we're both off duty, get someone to watch Abby for a couple hours and have a nice dinner. You know, we wear clothes that aren't issued by Starfleet, dim the lights, light some candles, eat food that isn't normally served in the mess. I'll even throw in a massage at the end," he winked at her.

"I'm thinking I want more than a massage," Marissa told him wryly, "but it does sound nice. We'll only have a four or five hour window of time, you know."

"I know," Jim told her with a huge smile. "But it'd be awesome, wouldn't it?"

"Yes," Marissa yawned, smiling sheepishly, "but it might be a better idea to skip the meal and take a nap instead."

Jim stood up and gently took Abby from her. "Four hours alone together and the only thing you can think of is a nap?"

"I'm a new mom," she smiled tiredly. "Abby may be almost eighteen weeks old, but I feel like I'm still trying to get the hang of this."

"You need to stop working so hard," Jim pointed out, nudging her toward the bed.

"Pot, kettle," Marissa replied, climbing under the covers. "Aja and I are almost done. We have a deadline; just a few more weeks."

"Where have I heard that before?" Jim mumbled as he put Abby into her crib, placing a kiss on her downy head.

"We'll have a date," Jim said as he came back into their room. "I'll plan it all. And if all you want to do is sleep, well then that's what we'll do," he told her as he slipped under the covers and curved himself against Marissa's back, one hand draped over her waist. "At least I'll have you all to myself."

Reaching back, Marissa awkwardly patted his hip. "Sounds good, Jim," she said sleepily. "G'night."

Shaking his head wryly, Jim planted a kiss on Marissa's shoulder. "It's going to be a damn good date, too, just wait and see." Closing his eyes he let his body relax, his mind spinning with the details of their soon to be first date.

It took Jim four days to get everything planned, something he was very proud of. Of course Rand had to help – a lot. He'd wanted to make it not only a date night, but a day for Marissa. She'd been working nonstop since Abby was born and she deserved some time off, even if she was working under a deadline. One day wouldn't matter; after all even he managed to get a full day off each week.

As Captain Jim tended to work twelve hour days and be on call all the time. But Marissa was just as busy. She was collaborating on an intensive project with Aja Killian along while following up with everything else she was working on. He had a lot of things to juggle in his job, but they tended to be focused on the ship and the current mission. He had no idea how she could manage everything. By his count she was in contact with eleven different planets that they had visited, three of which were new to the Federation. She seriously needed some down time.

Rand had suggested crewman Jacobs who worked part time in what was essentially the _Enterprise's_ spa. Being out in space from months if not years at a time, personal hygiene issues like haircuts had to be taken care of on the ship and Jacobs and a few others shared the duties. Jacobs also earned extra money doing manicures, pedicures, massages and the more specialized hair care like colorings, weaves, perms, and such.

He'd arranged for Jacobs to pamper Marissa from early morning to around noon, when Abby would need to be fed again. After the feeding, Jim would take over Abby's care in his ready room and Marissa could sleep. Then they'd have a nice romantic dinner – candlelight, a nice Cardassian wine, chocolate cake made by O'Leary the best chef on the ship, and then… well, hopefully he'd get lucky.

So far so good.

At first confused and not willing to let her research partner down, Marissa allowed herself to be pampered once she realized that Aja was in on the whole day off conspiracy. She had a manicure, pedicure, some kind of weird body wrap and a massage. Lunch had been with Abby and Jim in their rooms and then she took a three hour nap. Jacob's had then washed, cut and styled her hair – nothing too fancy, but it was currently soft and loose floating around her face and shoulders. Abby was fed once more and sent into the waiting arms of Nyota who was already cooing to her as they walked out the door, Spock's hand on her lower back as he guided the pair to their rooms.

Jim, or rather Rand, had chosen navy slacks and a deep blue button down shirt that set off his eyes for his date attire. Between Rand, Jacobs and probably Uhura, Marissa was wearing a burgundy dress with a sweetheart neckline that only emphasized the swell of her definitely larger breasts. Seeing Marissa standing self consciously in their living area when he entered with an ensign and their dinner, Jim was struck speechless for a moment.

The meal placed on the table, Jim thanked Ensign Chapman absently and then walked to Marissa, his eyes never leaving hers.

"You look amazing," he whispered, taking her hand and pressing a soft kiss to the back of it. "Good enough to eat," he smiled wolfishly.

Marissa blushed; she actually blushed. "You don't look so bad yourself," she told him.

His hand running softly over her loose hair, Jim leaned forward and stole a soft kiss. "What say we skip dinner and go straight for… dessert?"

Arms around his neck, Marissa pressed herself against him suggestively. "Why rush things? You promised me a real date, remember?" she reminded him. "Dressing up, nonreplicated food; it smells delicious. We don't want to disappoint Rand or O'Leary, do we? It'd be a shame to let all their hard work go to waste."

"Hmmmm," Jim replied noncommittally while nuzzling her neck, "can't say that I really care at the moment."

Marissa smiled. "Well, I do and I'm hungry," she told him, pulling back.

"Fine," Jim pouted at her and then winked playfully. "Computer music library twenty-six alpha." Instantly soft, jazzy music began playing.

"Nice," Marissa grinned.

Offering her his arm gallantly, Jim escorted her over to the table and helped her to be seated. Sitting down, he flamboyantly placed his napkin in his lap. "Let the date begin," he announced, "charming conversation, amazing wine, good food, romantic candlelight and… me!" Jim grinned as he poured out the wine.

Their meal was excellent. Jim had chosen as many of Marissa's favorite foods as possible – stuffed mushrooms and a tomato basil salad for appetizers, beef tenderloins, creamy garlic potatoes, sautéed green beans with pearl onions and bacon, and of course chocolate cake for dessert.

They sipped their wine while they ate, laughing and relaxing in each other's company. When Jim stood up and asked her to dance it was the perfect way for the meal to end. They swayed together to the soft music, enjoying holding each other close. Jim actually was a pretty good dancer. When a song with a more upbeat tempo came on he easily lead her through the complicated steps, swinging and twisting her around the room confidently. When the song was over, he pulled her close again, stroking her flushed cheek.

"What do you say we move this date to the bedroom?" he asked against her lips before kissing her softly.

"Yes, please," Marissa replied, wrapping her arms around him tightly.

Kissing and walking backwards, Jim eventually led her to their bedroom. Without words he set about slowly removing her dress, kissing and caressing each bit of skin as it was revealed. When she stood before him in only her bra and underwear, he dropped to his knees, taking one of her feet into his hands and resting it on his thigh.

"I love these shoes," he told her, his hands running up and down her calf. Slowly, he unbuckled the strap over her ankle and slid the two inch heels off her foot. "God, you have cute feet. Nice polish, by the way."

Marissa couldn't help laughing. "I thought they were a bit much," she admitted as he removed her other shoe. "They're not at all practical and I never wear heels."

"They're sexy as hell," Jim told her, kissing his way up her leg to her inner thigh. "You can wear them any time you feel like it. Clothing optional." By now he had reached the juncture of her legs and was lightly nuzzling her underwear, causing Marissa's head to fall back and a low sigh to come out of her mouth. Reaching down she ran a hand through his hair.

Standing up, Jim gathered her into his arms and brought her over to the bed. Laying her down gently, he covered her semi-naked body with his own clothed one and proceeded to kiss her like he needed her to live, thriftily removing her bra while he was at it. The fabric of his pants was rough against her legs, while his shirt felt like silk where it teased against her stomach and chest, sending her body into sensation overload.

Before too long Marissa was writhing against him, tugging at his shirt trying to get to his skin, Jim only smiled and tugged her hands above her head.

"Jim," she whined against his mouth, but he didn't reply, instead focusing his attention on her neck and shoulders. "Please… I want to feel you; your skin… against me."

"Not yet," he told her, working his way to her breasts. He really, really wanted to suckle her, but knew that wasn't a good idea at the moment, so instead he peppered kisses all around her nipples, nipping and sucking on the sensitive flesh of the undersides, before moving further down her body.

He spent time on her belly and hips, sucking a small love bite onto her right hip that had her moaning and moving restlessly, her hands now in his hair, tugging and then petting as he assaulted her senses. He skipped right over her underwear, spreading her legs and then proceeded to kiss and fondle and lick the skin of her inner thighs, his nose and hands only occasionally brushing against her warm center.

When his name finally became a high pitched whine, Jim sat back and quickly removed her panties. Diving in, he went straight for her clit, licking, circling, and then suckling hard.

"Ohhhh," Marissa arched off the bed, pressing herself against his mouth. "So, good…" she whispered. Then she tried to pull away, her hands pressing half heartedly against his head. "Too soon," she muttered, her hips moving instinctively against him. "Too soon. I want to… not yet… I want to enjoy this," she whimpered.

Jim only increased his ministrations and then she was shaking and quivering against his mouth, no sound coming from her as she was lost in her sharp orgasm. All too soon she was jerking away from him, too sensitive after such on intense experience. Jim rested his head and kissed her thigh, waiting for her to come down.

"That was too quick," she pouted down at him, her hands still stroking his hair as her body thrummed in the aftermath.

Jim smiled. "That was to take the edge off." He made no move to remove his clothes or move from his place between her legs. "I'm not done with you yet," he winked, grabbing a pillow and placing it under her hips.

Gently, he began his attack on her again, his tongue soft and pliant as he licked the evidence of her arousal. Ignoring her sensitive clitoris, he concentrated on her lips and folds, sucking and nipping, his tongue pressing against her entrance, rubbing against her perineum and sweeping lower to tease her. Occasionally his nose would brush against her clit and she'd pull away, still too sensitive, but he didn't let it stop him.

Eventually he brought his fingers into play. One hand rested underneath her, squeezing her ass and pulling at her cheeks, his fingers teasing her puckered hole. With his other hand he focused on her heated core, inserting one finger and then two fingers, crooking them slightly, as he began a slow and steady rhythm, concentrating on nudging her g-spot and caressing her entrance.

Marissa couldn't contain her moans as his fingers worked their magic and his tongue came back into play, circling and teasing her clit, but not with enough pressure to set her off again. With one foot resting on his shoulder and the other pressing into the bed, Marissa began to rock against his mouth and fingers, alternately pressing down onto the fingers inside her and the one teasing her other entrance, and then up into his mouth.

Up and down; fingers and mouth; she moved against him, her head thrown back, eyes closed, hands pressing into the headboard, reaching and reaching for the release that he was offering. Wanting it and needing it, but unwilling to let go, knowing he could take her higher than she'd ever been before if she could just hold on. Still, her body moved faster, her breaths harsh pants, like she was running uphill, unable to get enough oxygen to her starving brain. She couldn't think; she could only feel – Jim's mouth and his fingers and the palm of his hand cupping and squeezing her ass and then…

And then it was all too much and she was at the top and over the edge and she stopped breathing and her body tensed as she pressed her hips down and then she was shattering and keening and seeing stars and then…nothing as her body seemed to overload from the sensations that were spinning through her. She felt her fingers and toes tingling, her breasts were leaking, there was a sheen of sweat all over her body, yet all of this was overwhelmed by the throbbing, pulsating sensations that were centered where her legs met her torso and Jim's head rested.

When she became slightly coherent, she realized that Jim was holding her in his arms, stroking her back and pressing soft kisses against her temple. He'd removed his shirt and she reveled in the smooth heat of him pressing against her cooling skin as the sweat of her orgasm evaporated. Almost as an afterthought she could feel his erection pressed against her belly.

"Feeling good?" he smirked down at her when her eyes finally opened.

"Hmmm," she hummed and arched languidly against him. "I feel better than good. That was amazing."

Jim smiled. "I'm glad. Though I think my tongue is numb," he joked.

"It was worth it," she murmured, still floating on her post-orgasmic cloud.

His hands continued to explore her body, rubbing and pressing, his hips moving against her.

"What about you?" Marissa asked, her hands going to the waistband of his pants.

"Oh, it was definitely worth it," he muttered, nuzzling her neck.

"That's not what I meant," she laughed softly, popping the button on his slacks and sliding down the zipper. "I think you deserve a reward." Reaching in, she gently grasped his hard length. Jim hissed as she caressed the head, already covered with copious amounts of moisture.

Lying on his back, Jim lifted his hips and wiggled his way out of his pants, Marissa's hand never leaving him as she stroked gently, but firmly, from base to tip.

"Yes," Jim hissed, his hips stuttering into her hand.

Smirking, Marissa bent down and slowly took him into her mouth, her hand holding him tightly, her head bobbing up and down.

"Uh, Mariss…" Jim groaned, his hands in her hair not quite stopping her, but trying to hold her in place as his hips tensed not to drive up into her mouth. "You keep doing that and I'm not going to last much longer," he warned.

Letting him pop out of her mouth, Marissa grinned up at him. "Now that would be a shame." Straddling his legs, she began to crawl up his body, pressing herself against his hardness and making him gasp at the sudden heat and wetness. "I have plans for you," she whispered as she ground against him. Leaning down she kissed him deeply and they both moaned as his hips pressed up.

Panting, Marissa sat back slightly, arching her hips and angling to take him into her body. She closed her eyes and bit her lip as he slid into her, settling deep inside and filling her in a way that his fingers never could. Jim's fingers bit into her hips as he rocked into her.

"Oh, yes," he hummed deep in his chest as she rocked up and then pressed firmly back down. "Again," he moaned, his hands guiding her.

"Yes," she hissed at the sensation, her flesh already sensitized by two orgasms, was heating up at the fullness of Jim deeply inside her. Leaning down, she kissed him as she rocked her hips in a small movement that seemed to cause his whole body to tense and writhe against her. "Jim…."

"Marissa…" he all but whimpered against her mouth.

"Keptin!" a familiar voice interrupted their lovemaking, filling the room.

Marissa froze and they looked at each other incredulously.

"Oh come on!" Jim rolled his eyes and collapsed bonelessly onto the bed, one hand draped over his eyes.

"Keptin," Chekov's voice filled their bedroom again. "Ve haf incoming wessels."

"Seriously?" Jim asked in exasperation, now leaning up on his elbows, his erection already fading inside of Marissa.

"Uh, da Keptin," Chekov responded, nonplussed. "Four wessels. Two light cruisers, one heavy cruiser, and a freighter. Zey are old, but armed. Markings are unknown, sir," he repeated.

Jim looked up at Marissa who was trying to contain her laughter at the situation. Of course there were incoming unknown armed vessels when they were finally having sex.

"They are firing on us, Keptin!" Chekov interrupted again, his voice going up an octave. "Going to red alert. Shields are holding."

"Shit," Jim said as he dumped Marissa off his lap. Immediately the klaxons began blaring for all hands to battle stations. "I'll be right there, Chekov. Kirk out."

Grabbing his pants off the floor, he put them on quickly, hissing as he caught some hair in the zipper – one of the dangers of going without underwear. Going to the closet he grabbed one of his command shirts forgoing the undershirt as well. "Damn it, of all the times for a …." He muttered under his breath.

Marissa tried not to laugh as she put on her robe that she had thrown over a chair after her nap this afternoon. The door chimed and she quickly answered it knowing that it would be Uhura with Abby in tow.

Abby was not enjoying the emergency klaxon at all.

"Sorry," Uhura told her wryly, over the crying baby. "She was just going to sleep when everything went to hell. Do you know what's going on?"

"Four unknown vessels," Marissa told her. The ship suddenly rocked and there was a crash and a curse from the bedroom.

"Damn it!"

Marissa wanted to smile, but it was hard to see the humor when they were actually under attack.

"Apparently they want to pick a fight," she said as Jim came striding into the living area, hair sticking up, boots halfway done up, shirt askew.

"I'm really sorry," Uhura said again, taking in Jim's dishevelment with a small smile.

"Come on, Uhura," Jim admonished, making shooing motions with his hands. "No time for chit chat. Get to the bridge; we have some damn pirates to shoot." Leaning down he pressed a quick kiss to Abby's forehead then to Marissa's. "I want a rain check," he told her. "And next time we're doing the date backwards. Sex first, then food."

"Of course," she replied, trying to suppress a smile. Then the ship rocked again, this time from an evasive maneuver rather than from fire and her smile faded. "Be careful," she admonished.

"Always," Jim grinned. Slapping her on the rear, he exited their rooms, striding purposefully towards the Bridge.

Looking down at Abby, whose eyes were still red from crying because of all the noise and confusion, she smiled wryly. "This is not how this date was supposed to end. Poor daddy."

_Please review_


	6. Chapter 6

**Plus One**

"Permission to come aboard, Captain?"

Looking up from the PADD his was reading, Jim smiled. "Permission granted, Lieutenant."

Without another word he bounded out of his chair and was hugging the tall woman who had just entered the bridge. All eyes were on them as he kissed her cheek and smiled widely, holding her arms out as he took in her definitely not regulation attire of a silky blue skirt that barely came to mid-thigh and a black v-neck tank top under a short jacket that left nothing to the imagination.

"Don't you look hot?" he smirked appreciatively with a low whistle. "When did you get in?"

"You smooth tongued devil," the woman purred, stroking his cheek with a playful finger; "same old Kirk charm, huh? I came in on the supply shuttle ten minutes ago. I thought I'd stop by and see you first, see if everything's still a surprise."

"Yes, it is, amazingly enough," Jim replied, rocking back on his heels excitedly. "I didn't say anything."

"Good." The woman paused and looked uncomfortably over his shoulder, finally taking in all the eyes staring at her and the captain. "Uh, Jim…" she nodded back towards the main bridge area. "I… uh…"

Turning, Jim saw that they were the cynosure of every pair of eyes currently on the bridge. He smiled and pulled her forward. "Everyone, this is Janine, Marissa's best friend. Janine this is everyone," he said, waving to the bridge as a whole. "And this is Uhura and Spock." He brought her to a halt between the communications and science stations. "They'll be watching Abby for us while we're on planet tonight."

"It's nice to finally meet you," Janine smiled as she shook Uhura's hand and nodded at Spock.

"You too," Uhura smiled warmly. "Marissa's talked about you often."

"Don't believe half of it," Janine told her.

Pleasantries done, Janine turned to Jim. "Enough chit chat. We have five hours until we leave and I want to see my goddaughter."

"Of course," Jim laughed. "Rand? Can you escort Janine to our quarters, please?"

The blond yeoman nodded and stepped forward.

"Don't tire her out too much; I'm sure Uhura will want some play time before she goes to sleep for the night."

"Wouldn't dream of it," Janine told him, grinning over at Uhura. "I'll see you after your shift. Reservations are for seven o'clock local – and you're paying."

"Of course," Jim rolled his eyes as he went back over to his chair. "Have fun with my girls."

"I will."

Turning back to the PADD he'd been working on, Jim couldn't contain his grin. Tonight was going to be awesome!

xXx

"Janine, I don't know about this," Marissa called from the bathroom where she was staring uncomfortably at herself in the mirror. "I don't think this is really my style. I feel a bit… exposed."

"That's what the jacket is for," Janine called back. She was currently sprawled out on the bed playing peek-a-boo with Abby.

Marissa continued to stare at herself. Janine's visit and their subsequent date night was a total surprise to Marissa. And being her friend and knowing her so well, Janine had brought along an outfit appropriate for dinner and clubbing. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate the thought, it was just that Janine's idea of an appropriate outfit and her idea of an appropriate outfit was a bit different.

She was currently wearing a black skirt that hugged her hips and rear only to flare out into wide pleats, reaching a couple inches above her knees. It wasn't as short as Janine's skirt and it would be perfect for dancing – especially if Jim spun her around the dance floor. But it was still shorter than she was used to.

She was more dubious about the top. The fabric was a smooth, sensuous emerald green silk that Marissa loved feeling against her skin. But she was a bit hesitant about the cut. It did have long sleeves, only they were slit open from wrist to shoulder. And the neckline wasn't a plunging vee like Janine's, but the scoop was much lower than she was used too, her chest on display for everyone to see. Of course, the bra Janine had brought only emphasized her – assets – as Janine called them. The mini blazer was conservative enough, but it was also warm, so she couldn't imagine wearing it while on the dance floor, which after all was probably what Janine had planned.

The one item she had no complaints over was her shoes. They were the same strappy heels that she'd worn for her and Jim's first 'official' date that had ended with Abby screaming her lungs out for most of the night. Still, she remembered Jim saying he loved her shoes and that she could wear them anytime – clothing optional. Well she'd have to wear clothes tonight, but she didn't think he'd mind.

Sighing, she twisted her hair up into a loose topknot, letting some curls escape to soften the look around her face. Janine had already done her make up, so now all she had to do was feed Abby and send her off to Spock and Uhura's quarters.

Looking up as Marissa walked out of the bathroom, Janine let out an appreciative wolf whistle. "You're one hot mama," she told her with a wicked smile. "Jim's not going to know what hit him."

"That was the point, wasn't it?" Marissa responded dryly, still uncomfortable but willing to believe that lots of alcohol might help.

Abby, hearing her mother's voice twisted in her seat and promptly fell over. They had taken to propping her up with pillows and she could almost sit unaided, but she wasn't quite able to move around on her own – yet. Squealing happily she waved her arms and legs, looking at Marissa upside down.

"Are you ready for your night time snack?" Marissa cooed, picking her up off the bed. At just over six months, Marissa breastfed Abby only three times a day – in the morning, before her afternoon nap – if she wasn't in daycare, – and in the evenings. There were exceptions like whenever she wasn't feeling well or was upset and wanted the comfort of her mother holding her close, but for the most part she was getting her meals from frozen breast milk and the occasional bottle of formula. They'd just started introducing solid foods, but she wasn't too interested in that yet.

"I can't believe how big she's getting," Janine commented as Marissa settled in to feed her daughter. "Wasn't she born, like, yesterday?"

"It seems like it," Marissa smiled fondly down at Abby as she patted the breast that she was feeding from, her eyes half closed in bliss. "You only saw her for a couple of hours and that was over two months ago. She'd already grown so much since she was born by then. She's almost doubled her birth weight now."

Janine shook her head as she watched them fondly, still sprawled out on the bed in a most unladylike fashion. "I still can't believe you're a mom."

"And that Jim's a dad?" Marissa smirked.

"No, him I can believe," Janine said as she cocked her head and looked at Marissa. "Aside from bits and pieces of his reputation heard through rumor – which I try not to give too much credit to – I didn't know him until I met him on base. And by then he was so wrapped up in you… him being a dad isn't that big of a stretch for me. Now, you I've known since you were a blushing, naïve sixteen year old. I'm having trouble reconciling my image of you as wife and mother."

"Jim and I aren't married," Marissa pointed out as she switched Abby to the other side.

"Psh," Janine waved a hand in dismissal. "You don't have a piece of paper or rings, but you two are so married. Admit it."

Shaking her head, Marissa couldn't stop from blushing. "Maybe," she admitted. Looking down at Abby, she smiled softly.

Janine sighed. "See!"

"What?" Marissa asked, looking up in confusion.

"That look," Janine told her, "whenever you look at Abby or think of Jim. You get this… this… soft look on your face. Like those old Madonna and child paintings. It makes me so fucking jealous," she pouted good-naturedly.

Marissa rolled her eyes. "I can't help how I look. I'm happy."

"I know you are," Janine said seriously, "and I'm happy for you. I just can't believe how lucky you are. Here you are on the flagship of the fleet doing what you've always wanted to do; living in sin with the sexiest man in the universe; and you have the cutest baby ever! Face it 'Rissa, you won the space lottery big time!"

"I guess I did," Marissa replied with a satisfied grin. "But it hasn't been easy," she told her friend; "working and being a mom and trying to find time with Jim. I mean… I'm well aware how people look at and think of Jim and…"

"And he's completely besotted with you," Janine interrupted before she could say anything self-depreciating.

"Besotted?" Marissa repeated with a raised eyebrow. "Now who has been reading romance novels again?"

Janine shrugged, rolling onto her back and staring at the ceiling. "It's boring on a star base; a girl's gotta find some excitement somehow. Not everyone gets to shack up with super sexy starship captains."

"Yeah," Marissa countered, "having a baby doesn't exactly do wonders for your sex life, you know. The first couple months you're both exhausted and worn out. God, I've never felt so fat and unattractive in my life. I was leaking milk everywhere and I swear my ass was the size of a small planet." She shook her head. "And then as things got easier with Abby everything else got harder – more missions and debriefings and away missions and Jim working double shifts and…" she trailed off, shrugging her shoulders in defeat. "I can count on one hand the number of times we've had sex since Abby was born – and all of those times, but one, were interrupted in some way. Poor Jim…"

"Really?" Janine asked incredulously, looking over at her. "Each time was interrupted? Like… not finished… like someone was left hanging?"

Marissa nodded, blushing furiously, trying to hide her face in Abby's neck while she patted her back to help her burp. "One time… we were in the middle of… you know - and Chekov's voice comes over the comm. telling Jim that there are incoming 'wessels' and that they were firing on us. Instant mood killer."

Janine just stared at her and then started howling with laughter, startling Abby and Marissa. "That is just too fucking hilarious. Jim 'sex god' Kirk cock blocked mid coitus." She continued to laugh, holding her stomach.

Marissa tried not to smile, but it was funny. She could still see the expression on Jim's face. "He really confused Chekov when his first response was: 'Seriously?'" She chuckled. "Not what a captain is supposed to say when his ship's being attacked."

"No, no I suppose not," Janine sniffled as she wiped the tears from her eyes.

"What's so funny?" Jim's voice suddenly interrupted. He was standing in the doorway to the bedroom, both hands propped against the frame.

Janine took one look at him and started howling again. Marissa bit her lip and tried not to smile too widely.

"Nothing, sweetie," she told him. "Just girl talk."

He stared suspiciously at Janine for a moment, her face red and tears streaming down her face.

"You're ruining your make up, Janine," he told her, "and I really didn't need to know you're wearing a black thong."

That stopped her laughter instantly and Janine sat up and glared at him.

"Jim," Marissa rolled her eyes.

He waved a hand at Janine in exasperation. "I couldn't help noticing! She was rolling around laughing like a hyena. And that skirt is damn short!"

Holding up Abby, who obviously wanted to be with her father, Marissa smiled and shook her head. "Don't tease Janine."

Jim took Abby and bussed her cheek, making her squeal happily. "She was laughing at me!" he said indignantly. "Wasn't she Abby?" he asked in a sing song voice. "Your mean Auntie Janine was laughing at me."

"You'll never know," Janine responded haughtily, standing up and straightening her clothes. With her nose in the air she strode into the bathroom, but she couldn't contain her laughter once the door was closed.

Jim looked over at Marissa. "What were you guys talking about?" he asked again.

"Nothing, really," she told him, not meeting his eyes. "Just, you know - girl stuff. Why don't you gather Abby's things and we can get going."

Tossing Abby and making her squeal, Jim turned towards her bedroom and grabbed the overnight bag. "Did you have to pack her whole room, Mariss?" he asked her as he pretended to drag the bag. "It's not like Spock can't use his override to come in and get anything he might need."

"It's just easier," Marissa countered, standing up and straightening her blouse. "Why have them go to the trouble when I can just as easily put what they need in the bag?"

"Why indeed," Jim huffed, dropping the overnight bag onto the couch. Turning around he froze.

"What?" Marissa looked down at herself. "Did I forget something?"

"You look amazing," Jim said, his eyes moving approvingly over Marissa's body. "I don't think I've seen that outfit before – I would have remembered, and I love the shoes."

Marissa self consciously smoothed out her skirt, tugging up the neckline of her blouse simultaneously. "Janine brought the outfit. She figured I wouldn't have anything 'appropriate.'"

"I take back every bad thing I've every thought about Janine," Jim smiled as he circled Marissa, taking in all aspects of her outfit. "She's got great taste in clothes."

"Of course I do," Janine smirked from the bathroom doorway.

"Here," Jim said as he thrust Abby into Janine's arms. "Her bag is on couch, Spock and Uhura are across the hall and Medical's on level six. Bones is waiting for us. We'll meet you in the transporter room."

"Jim," Marissa shook her head fondly.

"Not a chance, lover boy," Janine said, pulling on the back of his shirt. "You've got just enough time to shower and change into something less… Starfleet. Marissa and I will take Abby to Spock and Uhura and then we'll meet you in the transporter room. You have fifteen minutes."

"I'll only need ten," he said, winking at Marissa and gathering her into his arms. He playfully bit at her neck while Janine pulled on his shirt even harder.

"We have reservations," Janine reminded him, "and Richie says this place is not to be missed."

"Really?" Marissa asked.

Jim rolled his eyes. "Well if Richie said it's good…"

"Oh, don't get your knickers in a twist," Janine smirked. "You got the girl."

"Janine," Marissa complained. "Richie didn't see me that way."

Jim rolled his eyes again. "Sure he didn't." He swatted Marissa playfully on the rear. "If I'm going to shower and change in fifteen minutes you two need to leave." He placed a kiss on Abby's forehead. "Be good for Uhura, munchkin. And give Spock hell."

"Jim!" both women exclaimed.

"What?" he grinned, grabbing the clothes Marissa had set aside for him and heading for the bathroom. "She's a Kirk. She should continue the traditions of her father. It's good for Spock."

XxX

Dinner was excellent and the wine served even better. They were three bottles in by the time dessert arrived. Both of the women were flushed and giggling as the enjoyed the chocolate decadence that was dessert. Jim and McCoy watched them indulgently, leaning back in the chairs and enjoying a glass of the planet's finest whiskey-like beverage.

"I'm stuffed," Marissa sat back in her chair, licking that last of the chocolate off her spoon. "I don't think I can dance. I don't think I can move."

"We've got all night, dear," Jim told her indulgently, reaching for her hand and playing with her fingers. "No need to rush things."

"What we need," Janine told them, draining the last of her wine and setting her glass firmly on the table, "is some fresh air. That will perk us up. The bar district is a couple blocks away. Fresh air, some exercise and you'll be good to go 'Rissa. I didn't come all this way for dinner – as good as it was. I want to go dancing." She looked at them pointedly, already a bit past tipsy. "But first I need to go to the ladies room. 'Rissa?" she looked at her friend expectantly.

Leaning over to give Jim a quick kiss, Marissa stood up and followed Janine.

"Why do they have to go in pairs?" McCoy asked no one in particular.

"No idea," Jim replied, finishing his drink and signaling for the check. "You up for dancing, old man?" Jim asked as he swiped his credit chip.

McCoy shook his head. "There is not enough bourbon in the world."

Jim snorted. "We'll see what Janine has to say about that."

Finishing his drink, McCoy sighed. "Yeah."

The walk was refreshing, but it took them three forays into different bars for Janine to find the one that was 'perfect' for them. Jim liked it instantly. There was lots of dark wood, low lighting and just enough patrons to make it feel busy, but not overcrowded. The bar was long and well manned, so they didn't have to wait long for their drinks and a table had cleared shortly after they'd arrived so they had a good view of the dance floor and bar. Had he come here in his pre-Marissa days he would have greatly approved of the odds – there were three females to every male, and while there were a variety of species, they were mostly humanoid.

"What kind of noise are they playing?" McCoy scowled as they sat down. "This can't be music."

Janine laughed and leaned closer to him, her chest brushing against his arm. "It's a retro bar. I think its late twenty-first, maybe twenty-second, century synth-rock. Lot's of drums and pulsing beats. It's perfect for dancing. What do ya say?" she looked at him through lowered lashes. "Wanna bump and grind?"

"I don't think so," he told her gruffly, clutching his drink.

"Suit yourself," Janine smiled as she downed her drink. "Be a dear and get me another? Come on 'Rissa," she called, "let's go show these boys how it's done."

Marissa looked questioningly at Jim, who smiled. "Go ahead; I'll keep Bones company for now." Then he leaned forward and kissed her possessively. When she could barely breathe he pulled away, nipping at her bottom lip and smiling suggestively. "I'll be watching."

Rolling her eyes in disgust, Janine dragged her nonresponsive friend away from the table. "I swear," she mumbled under her breathe, shaking her head, "should just get a damn room!"

Jim continued to smile as he watched Marissa stumble after Janine. "What?" he asked when he glanced over at McCoy to find him staring at him as if he was some kind of specimen in his lab.

"Nothing," McCoy replied, taking a sip of his drink. "Just… I never thought I'd see you like this."

"Like what?" Jim asked defensively.

"Like… like that," McCoy waved his hand to encompass everything that had just happened. "You're possessive and territorial and… I know you and Marissa are together and happy. I see it all the time on the ship, but this is the first time I've seen it in a bar, you know, your old stomping grounds."

"It's not a bad thing," Jim said, shrugging. 

"Never said it was," McCoy replied. "Just different." He flagged down a waitress and ordered another round of drinks. The room was definitely warmer with all the bodies crammed in it, moving to the beat of the music. The girls were going to be thirsty.

"Oh my god," Jim muttered, pulling McCoy's attention away from the bar area.

"What?" he asked.

"Look," Jim replied, nodding towards the dance floor.

It didn't take him long to find Janine and Marissa. They were indeed bumping and grinding, a light skinned, scantily clad, humanoid female with them. The music had a fast, stuttering beat behind it, like a heart going into arrhythmia. They danced around each other with sinuous moves; hips swaying, arms in the air, legs dipping and flexing as they moved as one body.

"That's hot," Jim whispered, and McCoy couldn't disagree.

Soon they were joined by a human male, who placed a hand on Marissa's hip and then proceeded to move with her. Jim stiffened, but before he could react further, Janine had swung around and was pulling the guy against her, wrapping an arm around his neck as she continued to sway. Marissa moved behind her, pressing against her friend as they danced with the stranger.

When the song ended the guy said something to Janine, his mouth not far from her ear. She laughed and shook her head, grabbing Marissa and pulling her towards the table. Once seated, Jim put his arm around Marissa's shoulders and pulled her in for a deep kiss, his eyes locking with their erstwhile dancing partner. With a shrug, the man turned away to find another partner – or two.

"Can you be any more obvious?" Janine laughed.

"What?" Jim asked innocently.

"We were just dancing, Jim," Marissa told him, still leaning heavily against him. Reaching out, she grabbed her drink and downed it quickly. "Man, those are good." Raising her empty glass, she looked for the waitress. "Can I get another?" she yelled.

"Go easy, Mariss," Jim warned. "When was the last time you've had this many drinks."

"I don't know," Marissa told him, her head lolling against his shoulder. "Probably my twenty-first birthday."

"That was a good one," Janine cackled. "Little Miss Priss finally let loose."

"You're a bad influence, Janine," Marissa told her friend, trying to frown and be serious, but it didn't work.

"I know," Janine answered with a wicked smile. "Let's dance some more."

Grabbing their new drinks from the startled waitress they made their way to the dance floor; drinks in hand.

Jim made it through two more drinks and three more songs before McCoy growled at him. "Oh go dance with her, for chissakes!" He couldn't handle Jim tensing up every time a man tried to dance with Marissa. Usually Marissa would ignore them and they'd go away, or Janine would cut in, but it was making Jim edgy.

"Thanks, Bones!" Jim was up from the table and gone in an instant.

"Like you needed my permission," McCoy muttered, downing the rest of his beer. He watched as Marissa tensed as Jim grabbed her from behind, and then relaxed as his arms wrapped around her and she recognized him. They began to move to the music.

He'd seen Jim dance with girls plenty of times, but the more he watch him dance with Marissa the more uncomfortable McCoy felt. Dancing with strangers was just dancing – with some suggestive movements. Watching Jim dance with Marissa was almost like watching them have sex. They were totally oblivious to everyone around them and their movements were totally in-sync, like they'd done this a thousand times before.

"Well, it took him long enough," Janine said as she slid into the chair next to him.

"You girls looked like you were having fun," McCoy shrugged. "Maybe he didn't want to interrupt."

"Oh we were having fun, but I think Marissa's having more fun with him," Janine told him with a smirk. She turned and they watched as their friends continued to move together in a very sensual way, Jim's hands holding her ass as they rubbed against each other to the rhythm of the song.

"Hmphf," McCoy snorted as he signaled for more drinks.

XxX

"I was wondering when you'd show up," Marissa whispered into his ear, her tongue flickering out briefly.

"I thought you were enjoying yourself," Jim replied, grinding up against her.

"I was," she told him, running her fingers through his hair, "even more so now."

"I see," Jim leaned forward and began to kiss her neck, their bodies still moving in time to the music. They moved against each other, lost in the pulsing music and the feel of each other. At one point an Orion female tried to join in, but was ignored, then a human male tried to grind against Marissa in counterpoint to Jim, but Jim's growl was obvious even over the loud music and the man left quickly.

Somewhere during the third song Jim's hands drifted up Marissa's back and shoulders, before pressing her chest firmly against his. Marissa gave a little moan, and Jim pulled back slightly, looking at her in question.

Reaching up and cupping herself, Marissa swayed against him. "I'm so full I hurt, but, God Jim, I don't want to stop," she rubbed against him suggestively, her hand pressing against his almost constant erection. "I'd fuck you on the dance floor if I could."

Jim stopped moving and stared at her, his eyes blown wide and his breathing heavy. Grabbing her hand he started pulling her from the dance floor. He took her past the bathrooms and into a small ante hall near the kitchens. Opening and closing doors quickly, he finally gave a crow of triumph as he pulled her into a small closet. The smell of bleach and linens overwhelmed Marissa as he closed the door behind them.

There was a small click and the closet was filled with the harsh light of an overhead panel. Marissa didn't even have a chance to look around before Jim backed her against some low shelves and began to kiss her savagely. She leaned back, her head resting against something soft, as Jim's hands crept up her torso to cup her breasts.

"God, they're rock hard," Jim murmured against her next, nipping and kissing the sensitive skin of her neck.

"They hurt," Marissa hissed, only partially in discomfort.

Grabbing the hem of her shirt, Jim quickly pulled it over her head. Looking down he admired the black silk bra that seemed to barely continue her swollen breasts. Without a word her reached behind her, unhooked it and removed her bra. Marissa gave a moan as his hands moved to support her. Moving slowly, Jim bent his head until he could take her nipple into his mouth. He licked it gently, Marissa's hands moved through his hair tugging him closer, her head thrown back.

Slowly, he took her nipple fully into his mouth, rubbing his tongue over it before puckering and sucking on it tentatively. Marissa groaned and he began to suckling in earnest. At first nothing happened, but Marissa's hands tightened almost painfully in his hair. He tasted something on his tongue, but just barely.

"Harder," Marissa moaned, holding his head against her breast.

He doubled his efforts and suddenly he wasn't simply suckling, he was swallowing as her milk let down in a steady stream. It tasted watery and not at all like he expected, sweeter, and as the milk continue to flow it became thicker and richer. For some reason, even though he had watched Abby feed numerous times, he was surprised that after it started he didn't need do anything but swallow.

"The other one," Marissa whispered guiding his head to her other breast after a while.

"Yes," she whispered as he brought her relief, her hands running through his hair and over his shoulders. Eventually the milk slowed and Jim pulled away, by now he was kneeling on the floor at her feet. He reached under her skirt and slowly pulled down her panties, his eyes never leaving hers.

Reaching down, Marissa swiped at a smear of milk on his lip; reflexively Jim reached out and sucked her finger into his mouth, laving it with his tongue. His hands continued to remove her panties then began to sweep up and push her skirt up, one hand working around to cup her ass. Releasing her finger he brought his mouth to her warm, wet center and put his tongue to better use. As he pleasured her, one hand moved to his pants and began to undo his belt and then the snaps, easing his zipper down as quickly as possible in order to release his straining erection.

"Jim, Jim," Marissa started chanting under her breath, her legs spread and his head firmly between them. "Yes, right there…yes… yes…"

He sucked her clitoris into his mouth and she exploded against him with a high keening wail. He held on until she began to shudder and twitch against him.

Tugging impatiently at his hair, Marissa drew him up so that he stood before her, taking his mouth in a sweeping kiss, the taste of her strong on his tongue. "Fuck me now, Jim. Please? I need you now," she whimpered, shimmying against him.

"Fuck yeah," Jim groaned, grabbing one of her legs and hitching it around his hip, as he dropped his pants around his knees. Lifting her slightly, he helped her balance on the short counter behind her as he entered in one easy stroke. He held still for a moment as they both relished the feel of him deep inside of her, then nothing else matter and he began to move, in and out, his movements short and forceful, then slow and teasing. Marissa wrapped her legs around his hips and held on, her nails unconsciously clawing at his shoulders, causing Jim to hiss and drive deeper.

It didn't take much longer and Marissa was once again spasming against him, her muscles clenching and milking him until Jim finally let go, his hips stuttering as he poured himself into her.

They stood together, Jim panting, Marissa humming occasionally as she ran her hands over his back and shoulders, needing to feel him.

"That was…" Marissa began breathlessly.

"Awesome," Jim finished, finally managing to lift his head from where it rested on her shoulder. They kissed softly, until finally Jim softened and slid out of her body. Grabbing the nearest thing – a napkin of some sort, Jim gently cleaned off Marissa and then himself before he did up his pants and straightened his shirt.

"Mmmmm," Marissa hummed as she kissed him again once she was fully dressed. "I'm going to go to the bathroom and… freshen up," she laughed softly. "Meet you at the table? I'm thirsty."

"I'll get you another drink and some water," he told her, kissing her again, before opening the door to the closet hesitantly. No one was around, so he ushered her out quickly.

He stopped briefly in the men's room to rinse of his face and check his hair, and then it was to the bar where he ordered another round of drinks. His legs were a bit shaky as he made his way over to their table and sat down heavily.

"Where the hell have you been?" McCoy snapped, looking over his slightly disheveled appearance. "And why is your face wet?"

Jim blinked slowly, staring at his friend with one eye closed, a silly smile on his face. "'Cause I just washed it."

"Why the hell would you wash your…" McCoy trailed off, his inebriated brain finally catching up. "Oh fuck you didn't…"

Jim nodded smugly.

"In the bar?" McCoy asked incredulously.

Jim nodded again.

McCoy shook his head in disgust. "I take it back – you haven't changed at all."

"Sure I have, Bones," Jim said, slapping him on the back and earning a glare in return. "This time I'm planning to take the same girl home with me and I'm not going to let her out of my bed until at least noon."

McCoy snorted into his beer. "Abby's going to need her before that; or rather she'll need Abby."

Jim paid for the drinks that the waitress dropped off and took a long pull on his beer. "I think I can take care of that. Don't want my daughter to get tipsy off all Marissa's drank tonight. What kind of father would I be then?" He winked at McCoy whose jaw practically hit the table.

"You… you? And…she let you?" he stuttered.

"Yep," Jim grinned widely. "And it was pretty hot." As if on cue he let out a small burp.

McCoy shook his head. "I don't want to know. Oh god, I really didn't need to know that. Ugh," he shuddered dramatically. "Bad enough seeing you two dance like you're having sex right on the dance floor. I really didn't need that image in my mind."

"Hey! We didn't have sex on the dance floor," Jim protested. "We had sex in the linen closet."

McCoy palmed his face in despair. "I'm never going to be able to look at Marissa again, damn it!"

"Speaking of Marissa," Jim said, looking around. "Where'd she go? She said she was just going to stop off in the bathroom to straighten up."

McCoy looked around and then bit back a groan.

"What?" Jim demanded.

"Over there," McCoy nodded with his head. "Your lovely partner is putting on a show with her best friend on the goddamn bar!"

"Shit," Jim said, suddenly reaching into his pocket.

"What?" McCoy asked, looking at Jim.

Jim tossed a scrap of fabric onto the table. McCoy poked at it briefly, trying to figure out what it was.

"Marissa's not wearing any underwear," Jim declared as he stood up and started to make his way to the bar.

"Well hell," McCoy said, recoiling from the fabric on the table. "They're getting one hell of a show then."

Jim made his way quickly back to the bar; part of him was amused by Marissa and Janine's flagrant display, the other part was furious at all the males staring up at his… his… just his, damn it! They were dancing with four other females, one of which was the Orion that had danced with them earlier. There was a crowd of men standing below watching the performance. One tried to grab the Orion and got a foot to his chest in response. The girls weren't necessarily dancing for the men, then. That was good.

Janine and Marissa were oblivious to the crowd around them, doing some sort of routine that they'd apparently done before. It was when Marissa did a large swirl of her hips and then squatted that Jim began to see red. There was a guy standing right next to the bar that was getting an eyeful and fully enjoying it with a lecherous grin.

Moving through the crowd, Jim grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back.

"Hey!" the guy complained, shoving back at Jim. "There's plenty of room for everyone."

"Show's over, man," Jim told him. "Go find someone else to ogle."

"The shows free," the guy shouted back over the music, "and the girls obviously don't mind, so back off! What? You own one of them?"

Jim shoved his way in front of the guy and put a hand on Marissa's leg. She almost trampled on his fingers, but stopped as she recognized him. "Come on, Mariss," he called up to her, "time to come down."

"Ah, Jim," she pouted. "We're having fun," she spun around and moved against Janine, who put an arm around her waist to keep her balanced. "This is our new friend, Taleda," she motioned to the Orion. "She's a good dancer."

"That's nice," Jim tried to smile, but the guy was once again trying to look up her skirt. Trying to be subtle he elbowed him in the chest as he reach up for Marissa again. "Why don't you come dance with me? I got you another drink."

"Ohhh," she purred, squatting down in front of him, running her hands through his hair. "Is it one of the lovely pink ones? I love those. Tastes like candy."

"Yes, the pink one," Jim replied in exasperation, trying to tug her skirt down and block anyone's view. "You're not supposed to move like that when wearing a skirt, Mariss," he scolded, "especially when you're not wearing any underwear."

"I'm not?" she looked at him blankly. "I was earlier."

"Yes you were," Jim smirked.

She narrowed her eyes at him. "You took off my underwear," she accused, pointing a finger at him and almost poking his eye.

Someone gave a wolf whistle and someone else pounded on his back in congratulations. Jim shrugged them off with a snarl and a glare. Really, it was one thing for Bones to know he and Marissa had had sex in the bar, everyone else didn't need to know.

"You didn't mind at the time," Jim told her, gathering her into his arms and sweeping her off the bar, not giving her a chance to protest. "You coming Janine?" he called up to their friend.

"Hey man, don't ruin the show!" someone called out.

"Screw you!" Jim called as he placed Marissa unsteadily on her feet and helped Janine off the bar. She wasn't much better off, but luckily McCoy decided to join the fray and took her arm in support.

Turning, he and Marissa ran smack into a tall, broad shouldered human. "Leave the girls be," the man told him in a deep voice. "What's it to you if they want to dance for us?"

"What's it to me?" Jim stared up at the giant incredulously, pressing Marissa behind him. "It so happens that this part of your 'show' belongs to me, so back off and let us pass."

"Don't see no ring," the giant said, crossing his arms and staring down at Jim. "You belong to him, girl?"

Jim shook his head. "Doesn't matter, she's mine so you can just fuck off. There's still girls on the bar for you to watch. Now move," he said in his best captain's voice.

For a moment the giant paused, probably caught off guard by Jim's sudden aura of command.

Marissa moved between the two men while they stared each other down. Hands on her hips she glared up at their living road block. "I'm his," she declared. "And he's mine. And any show I put on is for him alone," she declared, her words only slightly slurred. "So get out of my way before I do something you'll regret! I swear if you ruin our date I will not be happy. And you don't want to see me unhappy."

Jim had to smile at her fierceness, she barely come up to the man's chest, but she was forcefully poking him in the sternum and the man was backing away. He was even trying to hold back a smile of his own.

Holding up his hands, he backed off, bowing to Marissa and smirking lewdly at Jim. "Got a handful there, I see," he commented as Marissa pranced by followed closely by Janine.

"You have no idea," Jim rolled his eyes, following.

xXx

They ended up staying in the bar for another hour. Janine even convinced McCoy to get out on the dance floor, much to Jim's amusement. He wasn't the most comfortable dancer, even in his drunken state, but Janine didn't seem to mind.

Jim and Marissa stayed focused on each other, letting the music move them against each other. As one song ended, Marissa leaned into Jim, breathing heavily against his ear. "Are we going back to the ship tonight?" she asked.

"That wasn't part of the plan," Jim told her, holding her close against him.

"Good," she replied. "Let's get out of here."

"What about Bones and Janine?" Jim asked, glancing around for their friends.

"They're grown ups," Marissa told him. "They'll be fine." Grabbing his hand, Marissa pulled him through the dance floor until they found McCoy with Janine draped all over him.

"Janine!" Marissa grabbed her friend. "We're leaving. I got plans for Jim and I can't do them here."

"That's not what I heard," Janine laughed, wrapping her arms around Marissa and giving her a sloppy kiss on the check. "Love you, kiddo, go shag your sex god."

"Sex god?" Jim perked up at the words.

"Lord," McCoy rolled his eyes, "as if his ego isn't big enough."

Marissa just laughed and grabbed Jim's hand. "Come on Captain; let's go so I can have my wicked way with you!"

"Tramp!" Janine called after them.

"You taught me well," Marissa said as she spun around. Luckily Jim was there to keep her from falling over.

"Come on, Mariss," he said, guiding her to the exit. "Tell me more about my sex god status and what your wicked plans are for the evening."

Marissa just smiled at him knowingly and preceded him out the door, hips twitching suggestively.

"Well, all right then," Jim smirked to himself. "Follow that ass."

xXx

Jim woke the next morning with Marissa sprawled perpendicular across his body, her belly stacked on top of his, one of his hands resting on her ass. It had been one hell of a night, one of the wildest he could remember, and that was including when he was sleeping with anything that had tits and a pulse, as Bones so quaintly liked to point out.

He wondered what his crew would think of his 'little librarian' if they knew what she got up to on shore leave. For her quiet and reserved reputation she was quite the little adventuress when she wanted to be. Janine had hinted at this side on their visit to Star Base 94, but Jim had had no idea. He kind of liked her more forceful side as she used him as she pleased. He wanted to please her, and she definitely pleased him. It was a win-win situation to his way of thinking.

They had to go out more often. Or at least pawn Abby off on the crew once a month. She'd been very inventive in what she wanted to do to him, but being only human his body had given out eventually. Now he was currently tired and sore in all the right places. He hoped that she wasn't uncomfortable with what she had done and said.

"Ohhhh," Marissa moaned as she began to wake up.

"How you doing?" Jim asked, rubbing her back and bottom.

"Shhh, not so loud," she groaned.

"Sorry," he whispered with a smile.

Blearily she looked around, noticing her strange position. "How'd I end up like this?" she asked, pushing herself up on her hands and knees slowly.

"I have no idea," Jim told her, "but I kind of like it."

"My head," she mumbled as she sat back onto her haunches, falling slowly sideways so that her head rested on the pillow next to Jim's. "How are you not totally hung-over?"

Jim shrugged. "I've had years of practice and I didn't drink as much as you did," he told her. "Besides, I have body mass on my side."

"Sure, sure, just because I'm short…"

Rolling over, Jim wrapped his body around her prone form, his chin resting on her shoulder. "Them's the breaks. Can I get you anything? Bones gave me some hangover hypos before we came down."

"Oh blessed mother of relief," she sighed. "I love that man. Hit me with it."

"Sure, you love Bones," Jim pouted, reaching over her to the nightstand where he'd left the medicine. "I'm the one who's giving it to you." He armed the hypo, as he liked to think of it, and then pressed it gently against her neck. With a small hiss and moan from Marissa, he released the medicine into her bloodstream.

She lay there for a moment, her eyes closed as it rushed through her system, relieving her symptoms almost instantly. After a while she opened her eyes and looked up at Jim who was still hovering above her, a fond smile on his face.

Reaching up, she traced his eyebrows and cheekbones, caressing the stubble on his chin. "Just for the record," she told him softly, cupping his face and looking him straight in the eyes. "I loved you first."

Jim's eyes widened at her admission, stunned by the words that he hadn't believed would ever be spoken to him. And he believed her; without a doubt. A slow grin spread across his face as he nuzzled her hand. "That's good to know. I'd hate to have to kill my best friend."

Laughing, Marissa leaned up and kissed him. "What do you say we move this little party to the shower?" she asked. "My boobs are killing me and I think we could both use a good scrub down after last night. I'm feeling distinctly sticky in certain places."

Standing and holding out a hand, Jim pulled her off the bed. "Sounds like a good idea to me. Spock and Uhura aren't expecting us until after lunch, which gives us at least three hours. I'm sure we could manage a shower and maybe some breakfast in that amount of time."

"Just a shower and breakfast," Marissa pouted as she reached out to caress his semi hard erection.

"Damn it woman," Jim scowled in an amazing impression of McCoy, "I'm a starship captain, not a sex god!"

Giggling, Marissa pressed her face against his chest. "Oh that was too good. The next time he says something like that I won't be able to take him seriously," she continued to chortle. "Come on, lover boy," she grabbed his hand to lead him to the bathroom.

Jim stopped just outside the door, tugging on her hand. Turning back she looked at him questioningly, her head cocked to the side waiting for him to tell her why they weren't in the shower already.

Uncomfortably, he looked down at the floor, then at Marissa and then at a spot over her left shoulder. "Marissa, I…" he began hesitantly.

Stepping forward, she pressed a finger to his lips. "I know, Jim," she said, smiling at him softly. "I know."

"It… I… I do… you know?" he tried again. "I just never… I've never…"

Kissing him chastely to stop him from rambling, she looked up at him and smiled. "When you're ready you can say the words. Why don't you show me now?"

Smiling crookedly, Jim nodded. "I can do that." And he followed her into the bathroom.

xXx

"Jim, when you said you would be back after lunch," Spock intoned, trying to look down his nose disapprovingly but failing miserable because Abby was currently sprawled across his chest, as he reclined on the couch, "I assumed you would be here before Miss Abigail's nap. She did not enjoy taking another bottle and was most stubborn in not wanting to rest."

Jim looked at his first officer sheepishly, feeling guilty that Abby had been distressed by their absence. "Sorry Spock, something… came up," he couldn't help smirking, "and we ended up staying a bit longer than planned. You know what they say about assuming, right?"

Spock raised a condescending eyebrow.

"Never mind," Jim shook his head, not willing to make that joke when Spock was looking at him like that. "I'm sorry for the inconvenience. I promise next time we'll be back on time. I can take her now."

"I do not think so," Spock informed him.

"Excuse me?" Jim asked incredulously.

"It took much effort on my part to for Miss Abigail to fall asleep. She needs her rest. I will not disturb her now," Spock informed him. "I will bring her to you when she awakes."

"Okay," Jim drawled, backing out of the room slowly, "if you're sure."

Spock's raised eyebrow brooked no arguments and Jim beat a hasty retreat.

"Where's Abby," Marissa asked when he stepped into their quarters empty handed.

"Uh, well, I think Spock just told me to fuck off, she's sleeping," Jim told her with a strange expression on his face. "Not in so many words, but that was the gist."

Marissa bit her lip, trying not to laugh. "I guess we should get back on time next time," she said.

Jim shook his head, his expression still stunned. "I think Abby's spending too much time with Spock," he told her. "We should find someone else next time."

"Daddy's jealous," Marissa taunted.

"Am not," Jim countered, but then smile sheepishly. "Maybe I am. She was sleeping on him, Mariss. And he looked fine with that. It's like the universe is spinning the wrong way when a Kirk doesn't annoy Spock. It's just wrong!"

"Come on, Jim," Marissa said, towing him to their bedroom. "She's still totally a daddy's girl. And if she just fell asleep we've got an hour or so. I don't know about you, but I could use a nap."

Jim nodded, toeing off his shoes. "Sleep sounds good," he said before yawning widely.

They were asleep almost as soon as their heads hit the pillow. It's not like they got a lot of rest the night before.

**The End** _(of this part of their story)_

_First Impressions and Quality Time should follow shortly._

_Please review – all the alerts and favorite stories are wonderful, but I'd really like to know what you think. Good or bad. Even if it's just a smiley face or a frown-y face._


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